.. I'm happily married and have three kids. Ruth really screwed me up inside, yet I still think back to those days and fantasize about having a time machine to go back and do something to change things so I'd end up with Ruth.I always return in my mind to a warm Spring day in May of 1986 as the "nexus" for my best opportunity to change how the future unfolded. And ironically, it was at an event celebrating a certain television show about time travel that my best shot at finally "sealing the deal" with Ruth was missed. Or so I like to think in retrospect. I have written the way things should have gone over and over in my mind, but decided today to share this story. Maybe Ruth herself will read it some day and at long last know the truth and just what was lost that day.May 1986 - "The 5th Dimension" RV - Parked Beneath the Washington Monument on the Mall in DC...Ruth E. and I have been invited by the local television station to come down to the launch of a traveling exhibition being. Well maybe not all my life, but for sure the last part of it. I can’t remember feeling lost and alone before my dad left my mother. Truth is she took me and we left him. It was worse somehow because he didn’t think I was worth fighting for. At least that’s how I felt. And Mom, God love her, played the victim even though she was already living with a lawyer.I had to find a new position in a new family. When I figured it out, I was fourteen years old. To be honest it wasn’t my step father’s idea. It was mine totally. I can only blame him from not saying no. He was a grown man and I was a fourteen year old child. That isn’t the point.The point was I began to flirt with my step father. I felt like that assured my place in the family, so I kept it up. I sold my soul for an I phone. Everything thing that happened was my own fault. He never instigated anything. I took everything he offered me, and went only as far as I wanted.The flirting was a personality trait by the time I went to.
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